Love it or loathe it, the New Year is upon us. A time where (most of us) feel the need to make drastic, unrealistic, sweeping goals in order to improve every element of ourselves – all in the name of “new year, new you”.
For those of you who stick to them, we salute you. For the rest of us, it’s time to break the cycle of disappointment and learn to create sustainable change. Don’t we all have enough to worry about and without putting extra pressure on ourselves? We think so.
This week, we caught up with our good friend Hattie, a confidence and mindset coach, on her top mindset shifts you can embrace, in order to send you into 2023 feeling lighter, brighter, and more in control.
Embrace the power of saying no.
Saying no, is ironically, the most liberating and freeing resolution to live by. It’s truly a one-size fits all approach – from social occasions you don’t enjoy, family gatherings you feel pressured to attend, taking on extra work when you’re already at capacity, or signing yourself up to provide home-baked cakes for the office party when you barely have time to brush your hair. The list goes on. Learning how to say no is the ultimate form of self-care, and no-one will think any less of you for prioritising your own needs. Once you’ve nailed the whole ‘saying no’ thing, you will find yourself with an enormous amount of free time, to do all the things you actually want to do. Trust me, it’s possible.
Learn to let go of what you can’t control (and focus on what you can).
Please believe me when I say, this is the single greatest gift you can bestow on yourself this year. After a chaotic and uncertain couple of years, it seems we have become wired to focus on the things that are widely out of our control. The root of many of our everyday worries, fears and anxieties, comes from us focusing on that dreaded ‘what if’ train of thought. More often than not, these thoughts focus on situations that are entirely out of our control. Once you acknowledge this, and are able to understand the difference between what you can and can't control, your entire mindset will shift, and your perspective will be so much clearer and more positive. This is a shift you practise everyday, by constantly reminding yourself – ‘I can only control what I can control’. Adopting this mindset switch will enable you to feel empowered, and free up space in your mind to make sustainable change. It’s a simple shift, but it’s brilliantly effective.
Cut the Comparison
Comparison is the thief of joy as they say – and this rings particularly true around the festive season. If scrolling through Instagram is making you feel miserable, stop. If you’re being triggered by content you’re seeing online (happy couples, ludicrous holidays, smug selfies etc) – either mute those accounts or turn your phone off. Instead, why not spend that time doing something more productive, or at least help peel the spuds. Don’t forget you’re only seeing a teeny tiny snapshot of someone’s life – be careful not to make assumptions and jump to conclusions that their life is as flawless as it appears. If there’s one thing we can all be certain of, focusing on what you don’t have will only make you miserable. There isn’t a finite amount of love, happiness or success in the world. I guarantee there’s enough of all of these wonderful things to go around. Flip those negative comparative thoughts on their head, and instead use them to show you exactly what it is you want in your own life. As horribly cheesy as this sounds, adopting an abundance mindset is the only way forward for 2023.
All hail J.O.M.O
What is this new acronym I hear you ask! Let me tell you, it’s one of the best yet - allow me to introduce you to The Joy of Missing Out. Embracing the simple sentiment of saying no. Feeling joyful, blissful and content about consciously choosing to ‘miss out’. It’s FOMO’s older, wiser, emotionally intelligent sister - the one we all really really want to be but sometimes don’t know how. Embracing the J.O.M.O movement enables you to make your own choices, and have complete autonomy over your decisions. Let’s look at Dry January as an example - how liberating would it be to just simply take it or leave it? Not feel pressure to conform, or judgement for those who partake. It’s as simple as that - knowing there’s joy in both, and you’re free to just ‘do you’. Life is too short to succumb to peer pressure. For the times I want to get stuck in, drink something delicious and not feel like I’m missing out - Punchy is my go to. It’s tasty and zany and leaves zero space for FOMO. Oh and lest we forget the glory of waking up without a hangover. What’s not to love?
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